Saturday, April 20, 2013
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Zach's Devotion from April 4th
I have entered the stage of cancer where I am actively dying. It could be weeks but we don't know for sure. My body hurts all over and I long to go home. Yet, I still long to give Jesus praise and glory with my last days on this earth. I have been dwelling on the love of Jesus all the time. If we understand His love, we can love Him in return with all of our hearts. This is the ultimate motivation - to give your life to Him because Christ gave His life for you and to love Him as He loves you.
"Is what you're living for, worth CHRIST'S dying for?"
Monday, April 15, 2013
March 30th Facebook Post:
Zach and I met with his doctors at IU Health yesterday. The pain specialist was able to change his pain pump medications, so it will hopefully give better pain relief. Zach's Oncologist shared with us that Zach most likely has less than two months to live. He will hopefully be starting Hospice services within the next week. Zach is peaceful about going Home and we both continue to put our trust in Jesus. We are so thankful for the love and support of our family and friends. I was humbled and so blessed by the many cards and gifts I received for my birthday this week.
April 10th Facebook Post:
Zach and I met with his doctors at IU Health yesterday. The pain specialist was able to change his pain pump medications, so it will hopefully give better pain relief. Zach's Oncologist shared with us that Zach most likely has less than two months to live. He will hopefully be starting Hospice services within the next week. Zach is peaceful about going Home and we both continue to put our trust in Jesus. We are so thankful for the love and support of our family and friends. I was humbled and so blessed by the many cards and gifts I received for my birthday this week.
April 10th Facebook Post:
Our family feels so blessed by the support of our family and friends. Zach continues to spend most of each day in bed, but we are thankful that his pain pump is working to make him comfortable most of the time (He still has moments of intense pain). He is signed up with Hospice and we are thankful that they are able to care for most of his medical needs. His body is weak but I am thankful that he is still able to enjoy conversations with visitors. We continue to rejoice in the work God has done through the Cancer Redemption Project. It is such a blessing to see God using Zach's suffering for His glory. Zach is finding a lot of peace in thinking about Jesus and looking forward to his Heavenly Home. We have been reading books about Heaven to the kids at night, trying to help them understand the Home that their daddy talks about. My prayer is that they will find passion to serve Jesus all the days of their lives.
Today's Facebook Post:
Our family enjoyed a wonderful wedding weekend. I am looking forward to seeing how God will use Aaron Gerber and Cassie Bertsch to further His Kingdom. Zach was able to attend many of the wedding events because of the wonderful accommodations that the event hosts made for him. His time at the reception was short and he enjoyed visiting the people who came up to him while he was there. We kept today pretty slow since Zach is tired from the weekend.
Hard to believe that a year ago today (March 15, 2012) Zach and I were on our way to Haiti to place children in the first two CRP Homes of Hope. So many wonderful memories.
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
February Review
February started with the reality that Zach's cancer had grown and that something had to be done about his increased pain (pain that was making it difficult for Zach to sit or stand). We made almost weekly visits to IU Health in Indianapolis to determine treatment options (see last post). My parents and Jason visited us February 7-10th. Some friends blessed Zach and I by babysitting our kids and giving us a gift card to eat At TW Fable for Valentine's Day. We went to a hotel in Fort Wayne with the Bertsch family the weekend of February 15-17th. The kids loved swimming and playing in the big jungle gym. Zach spoke to the Bluffton men at Finding Freedom on the 16th ( to listed on -line go to http://www.blufftonnorth.com/PreviousSermons.asp- March 16th). We enjoyed having dinner with Jon and Jennifer Isch on the 17th. Zach and I had a double date with Mick and Brooke Gerber on the 22nd. My mom, Josie (Adalyn and Weston), Julie, and Jacob and Beth (Malachi and Melea) all came to visit us the weekend of Feb 22nd-24th. I enjoyed a night out with other ladies on the 25th. Christa, Jack, and Willis and Anna and Coy came for a play date on the 28th.
Zion & Moriah with Grandma, Jason & Grandpa
Hotel Weekend
Malachi & Zion
Weston
Adalyn, Moriah & Melea
Jacob, Beth, Malachi & Melea
Julie, Josie, Grandma & Moriah
Jack, Zion, Willis & Moriah
Update on Zach
Facebook Update from Feb 1st:
Thankful that the CT scan showed that Zach's Cancer hasn't grown. 9 more weeks on the same chemotherapy before the next scan.
Facebook Update from Feb 5th:
Thank you everyone for the prayers and support. Friday (Feb 1st) as a whole was not a normal Chemo day for us. Zach was not on the chemo schedule so they had to fit him in (first time this has happened), we had some insurance hoops to jump through with our new plan in order to get some of his medication, and Zach forgot to ask for his CT results to be printed while he was hooked up to the ivs. I asked for them as we were walking out the door for home around 5:00. When I read the report later I had some concerns that the initial results we received in the doctor’s office were not correct (this was not a full report just the doctor’s quick look through the scan-from his assessment the old spots had not grown and he didn't see any new spots on the areas he looked at). I had Zach email his doctor for clarification. Zach spoke to his doctor today (Tuesday) and we found out that new cancer spots have formed in an area of his liver where they were not previously (the radiologist who reviewed scan found them and noted them in the report). This changes everything in terms of Zach's treatment. He is done with his current chemo and we will be meeting with his doctor later this week to make a new plan-possibly clinical trials or a newly approved chemo drug. We continue to trust that God has a plan for Zach and for our family. Please pray that we will have wisdom as we make decisions for what direction to go with his treatment and pain management.
Feb 8, 2013
We meet with Dr. Heft and Dr. Robb. Discussed chemo options with Dr. Helft. Dr. Robb is a rectal specialist so we talked about the possible causes of Zach's increased pain.
Feb 12, 2013
Dr. Robb performed and examination and determined that Zach has more wounds in his rectum/colon (likely caused by the chemotherapy drugs). He put Zach on an antibiotic to treat infections and a few days later recommend a pain pump over a surgery to put in an ostomy.
Facebook Update from Feb. 19th:
Thankful for the release of the new Pslam 100 CD "Home". Including the song "6 Months to Live." Those on CPR and LSM mailing lists will receive a CD in the mail this week (additional cds can be ordered at cancerredemption.com . The past few weeks have not been easy for our family as we have made weekly visits to IU Health to determine what to do for Zach's increasing pain and to explore options for continued chemotherapy since the chemo medications he was on for the last year and a half are no longer working. At our appointments today it was determined that Zach will need to have a surgery next week to place a pain pump that will hopefully give him better pain relief. If all goes well with the surgery he will be trying a new chemo medication that was approved in the last year. We continue to feel blessed for the many prayers on our behalf and for the way God is Redeeming Zach's Cancer.
Current Update:
Zach has a surgery to put in the pain pump on March 7th. The pump was attached in his abdominal muscles and holds 40ml of medication. There is a line that goes from the pump to his spinal column to give him direct pain relief. Zach gets doses of medication released slowly throughout the day and he can give himself additional medication using the pump up to 10 times in a 24 hour period. Zach continues to be in a lot of pain from his surgery. He is not sleeping well at night and is not able to sit because the soreness in his stomach muscles. He gets a headache when he stands up because of the hole that was put in his spinal column to insert the medication line. We are hoping that once his body heals from the surgery the pain pump with be effective in providing relief from the pain he had before surgery. Zach has a follow-up surgery appointment on Friday and he is scheduled to start taking his new chemo pills.
"Nothing compares to knowing and trusting the Lord is in control ... especially when everything around me feels unstable. He won't permit or plan something difficult for us to walk through without having a greater purpose behind it. One that will make us holier, more like Him, and shine His glory. Our experience is not in vain!" Van Walton (http://www.proverbs31.org/devotions/either-he-planned-it-or-he-permitted-it-2013-03/)
Thankful that the CT scan showed that Zach's Cancer hasn't grown. 9 more weeks on the same chemotherapy before the next scan.
Facebook Update from Feb 5th:
Thank you everyone for the prayers and support. Friday (Feb 1st) as a whole was not a normal Chemo day for us. Zach was not on the chemo schedule so they had to fit him in (first time this has happened), we had some insurance hoops to jump through with our new plan in order to get some of his medication, and Zach forgot to ask for his CT results to be printed while he was hooked up to the ivs. I asked for them as we were walking out the door for home around 5:00. When I read the report later I had some concerns that the initial results we received in the doctor’s office were not correct (this was not a full report just the doctor’s quick look through the scan-from his assessment the old spots had not grown and he didn't see any new spots on the areas he looked at). I had Zach email his doctor for clarification. Zach spoke to his doctor today (Tuesday) and we found out that new cancer spots have formed in an area of his liver where they were not previously (the radiologist who reviewed scan found them and noted them in the report). This changes everything in terms of Zach's treatment. He is done with his current chemo and we will be meeting with his doctor later this week to make a new plan-possibly clinical trials or a newly approved chemo drug. We continue to trust that God has a plan for Zach and for our family. Please pray that we will have wisdom as we make decisions for what direction to go with his treatment and pain management.
Feb 8, 2013
We meet with Dr. Heft and Dr. Robb. Discussed chemo options with Dr. Helft. Dr. Robb is a rectal specialist so we talked about the possible causes of Zach's increased pain.
Feb 12, 2013
Dr. Robb performed and examination and determined that Zach has more wounds in his rectum/colon (likely caused by the chemotherapy drugs). He put Zach on an antibiotic to treat infections and a few days later recommend a pain pump over a surgery to put in an ostomy.
Facebook Update from Feb. 19th:
Thankful for the release of the new Pslam 100 CD "Home". Including the song "6 Months to Live." Those on CPR and LSM mailing lists will receive a CD in the mail this week (additional cds can be ordered at cancerredemption.com . The past few weeks have not been easy for our family as we have made weekly visits to IU Health to determine what to do for Zach's increasing pain and to explore options for continued chemotherapy since the chemo medications he was on for the last year and a half are no longer working. At our appointments today it was determined that Zach will need to have a surgery next week to place a pain pump that will hopefully give him better pain relief. If all goes well with the surgery he will be trying a new chemo medication that was approved in the last year. We continue to feel blessed for the many prayers on our behalf and for the way God is Redeeming Zach's Cancer.
Current Update:
Zach has a surgery to put in the pain pump on March 7th. The pump was attached in his abdominal muscles and holds 40ml of medication. There is a line that goes from the pump to his spinal column to give him direct pain relief. Zach gets doses of medication released slowly throughout the day and he can give himself additional medication using the pump up to 10 times in a 24 hour period. Zach continues to be in a lot of pain from his surgery. He is not sleeping well at night and is not able to sit because the soreness in his stomach muscles. He gets a headache when he stands up because of the hole that was put in his spinal column to insert the medication line. We are hoping that once his body heals from the surgery the pain pump with be effective in providing relief from the pain he had before surgery. Zach has a follow-up surgery appointment on Friday and he is scheduled to start taking his new chemo pills.
"Nothing compares to knowing and trusting the Lord is in control ... especially when everything around me feels unstable. He won't permit or plan something difficult for us to walk through without having a greater purpose behind it. One that will make us holier, more like Him, and shine His glory. Our experience is not in vain!" Van Walton (http://www.proverbs31.org/devotions/either-he-planned-it-or-he-permitted-it-2013-03/)
Sunday, February 10, 2013
January Review
After Christmas in Indiana life continued to be busy. We left for Ohio on December 27th to celebrate Christmas with the Rufener family. Then on December 28th, Zach, Zion, Moriah, Julie, and I headed to Connecticut for my Cousin Samuel's wedding to Laura Virkler. On our way we stopped for dinner with Zach's cousin, Rachel, her husband, Jamie, and their two girls. We spend a great weekend with Warren and Bonnie Zahner. They were kind enough to host a Cancer Redemption Project Presentation in their home on December 30th. On the 31st, we headed to Eric, PA with my dad and brother, Jason. We stayed at Splash Lagoon, where we all enjoy the many indoor water activities. We returned to Ohio the evening of January 1st and then spend the rest of the week in Ohio. The kids enjoyed sled riding and playing with their cousins. We also visited Cameron at the hospital and spent an afternoon with Mike and Sarah. We finished our trip by attending Ben Gerber and Alyssa Maibach's wedding on the 6th.
Zach and I traveled to Indianapolis on January 7th and enjoyed dinner at the Cheesecake Factory. He had an early morning procedure at IU Hospital to have the stint in his ureter replaced. He had chemo later in the day. The rest of the week was rather slow with Zion, Moriah and I all feeling sick and Zach dealing with the effects of chemo. We all missed church on the 13th. Thankfully we started feeling better after the weekend.
We enjoyed hosting Jon and Amy Gerst on January 17th to share about their vision for serving in Ethiopia. We had a great time with Mick and Brooke Gerber on the 18th and then attended a potluck on the 19th. Casssie and Aaron came to hang out with us on the 20th. We were really excited by the arrival of Mike, Sarah, and Silas on January 23rd. They stayed until January 27th and we had a great time playing games, completing household projects (I always have a list for them), and relaxing. Mike and Zach took the kids (even Silas) to the Circus Thursday night while Sarah and I ate out with Sonya, Christa, and Tara. Uncle Darrel, Aunt Shirley, and Elise arrived on the 26th and stayed until after church on Sunday.
Zion, Moriah, and I all enjoyed spending with with Christa, Jack, and Willis on Tuesday the 29th and Christa kept the kids while I attended a meeting at Gateway Woods. Zach had meetings with LSM staff both Tuesday and Wednesday to prepare for upcoming fundraisers. Zion enjoyed attending Mason's fifth birthday party on Wednesday. Moriah had her first successful dentist appointment on Thursday the 31st. Thankfully she didn't have any cavities. In the evening Danny and Ryan Isch came over to play games with Zach while I took Zion to stay overnight with Mason and Moriah to stay overnight with Ashlyn. They were both excited about spending time with their friends since Zach and I needed to leave early in the morning for Indianapolis.
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